Cairns Connect

Film_Review: "Supernova" - *

This film with fairly unknown actors is about a fairly remote portion of the galaxy and should have been made in Italy, because that’s about as close it gets to a supernova. The young and sexually exuberant crew of the paramedic ship, the Nightingale 229 receives a distress call from a rogue moon. A mining operation that should have been abandoned (a bit like the script) when the moon went off track and started to circle into its blue gas giant mother. Co-incidentally the sexy black doctor just happens to have had a miserable affair with the man, X calling for help. A mere 1,300 or so light years away, they take the risk to dimension jump to help. A frantic throwing off of clothes is necessary before they can get into the plasma pods.

The captain is plasma splattered on the way as the ship resurfaces in a meteor storm and is dragged into the moon’s gravitational forces.

A shuttle arrives from the moon, despite being told the ship has 11 minutes to make another dimension jump or to be consumed by the blue giant. Somehow this is forgotten as the doctor examines the naked body of the young miner, Y, who was on the shuttle. After many tongue licking lips and pupil dilating stares by Z, the doctor’s young paramedic, W is brought back to consciousness, but not before they discover that he appears to have some additional bone growth, which the doctor records as "a mere anomaly". Z goes to check on him to find him gone, only to turn round and see him standing naked in all his glory. After seducing the young paramedic (who is also having an affair with another paramedic, W) by justifying that it will help her work out if she loves W and either way she will have a chance to aerate "a last wild explosion of passion".

There appears to be a special transparent zero G compartment that opens onto deep space that all the couples go to have sex. Meanwhile the new captain, V, countlessly offers to put his life on the line and ends up in the zero G compartment with doc. He sends the paramedic, W to clean up the shuttle and he finds a ninth dimensional artefact and W falls in love with it while his fiancee, Z, goes zero G with Y. Y offers to give them all a cut of the earnings from the artefact and V refuses. Instead V goes down to the mining complex and the action begins…

Some of the special effects are pretty good, like the dimension jump, the background space and moon, the mine complex and parts of the ship. The outside shots of the ship look a little tinny. There is a rather unfortunate robot that is dressed as a 20th century pilot and seems to have no point apart from giving a finger signal at the end. The artefact poses some issues as to explaining a new theory of a constantly recycling universe with the option of us becoming better or being obliterated, which lends itself to Christian overtones. There is a rather necessarily garbled moment when the computer technician, S, tries to convince the computer called Sweetie to override her prime directive to preserve human life by referring back to a holographic chess match they played.

Just remember V was addicted to Hazel, a sort of galactic heroin and has only just kicked it, A bit like you will if you go to see this sci-fi horror, that is unless you trick a partner into coming and you are both only after "a last wild, empty and fairly characterless explosion of passion" and horror.

P.S. for those interested in astrophysics it has got nothing to do with a supernova, which is when a giant star implodes due to its gravitational force exceeding its nuclear combustive energy. Sorry about the S, V, W, X, Y, and Z it seemed unnecessarily difficult to locate their names. For those into cryptic crosswords try and locate T.


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